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Grow Your Blog through Better Commenting



party crowdOn Day One of your blogging journey some guru told you – no doubt in her or his own blog on blogging – that one of the best ways to grow your site is to comment on the blogs of others.

It’s the proverbial slow road to riches, or even gas money, to be sure.  You see a lot of entrepreneurial tortoises crawling slowly down this path, but few hares because they’ve have pretty much been stomped into roadkill.

Maybe you commented on that guru’s life changing post, maybe not.  I’m betting not… entering your first comment can be as scary as hitting the PUBLISH button on WordPress for the first time.

But sooner or later you gotta go there.

Welcome to the Blogging Party

Commenting is very much like attending a party.  If you don’t speak up, if you don’t ask someone to dance, no one will notice you.  If you do, one of three things will happen, depending on your strategy:

  • You’ll quickly blend into the crowd and then just as quickly become anonymous…
  • You’ll come off as a dork, or worse, as arrogant or offensive…
  • Or you’ll shine as someone people would like to get to know.

Which means, in the latter case, that you’ll be invited back.  And if you continue your shiny ways, you’ll become a regular on the party circuit.

Even better, people will want to attend your party.  Which, in the non-analogous real world, is already underway on your website.

Here are four principles of decorum that will help you stand out, and in the right way.  Because staying neutral is the wrong way, at least if your goal is to leverage your comment into traffic for your own site.

Avoid the “hey nice post” Comments

Someone walks into a party.  They look nice.  You tell them they look nice. You comment

This feels good on the receiving end, too. You notice. But that’s all that you do. It isn’t enough to get the polite commenter a first date. 

It isn’t enough to post a “Nice post, dude!” comment and expect anyone to click through to your site.

It isn’t a bad thing.  It may even be a polite thing.  Go for it if “nice post” is what you need to express.  Just don’t mistake it for a blogging growth strategy.  Because for networking bloggers, “nice post” translates to: not a player.

Don’t Come Off as Overly Contrary

Some people like attention, and to get it they sometimes begin breaking things.  A few like to take a contrary position on just about everything, and by airing it out in a comment (going back to our analogy for a moment), it becomes the lamest strategy imaginable for getting asked back or attracting any type of attention other than negative energy.

You can take a stand, but pretend it’s your soon-to-father in law you’re challenging.  Be polite, look for ways to be gracious and acknowledge whatever aspect of your target isn’t reprehensible to you.

Everybody likes a self-thinker and a bold advocate.  Nobody likes an asshole.

Be Humbly Credible

Blogging is like online dating – it’s a safe place to be someone other than who you are.   But be warned, blog readers are extraordinarily perceptive and wary of B.S.  They can smell a fraud quicker than a gas leak in their bed partner.

There’s a fine line between making it clear and obvious that you know your stuff and making it clear and obvious that your intention is to make it clear and obvious.   Pretend there’s an ego meter wired to your keyboard, and you’re being evaluated on the least amount of bluster possible in what you put out there.

Ego is like an oil leak in otherwise pristine waters.  It destroys everybody’s interest, it repels readers and counters whatever shards of logic and creative ingenuity hidden in your post between the heavy-handed attempts to sound smart.

This can’t be taught.  But it can be observed, recognized, and them emulated.

Add Value to the Post

People who read blogs are for the most part bloggers themselves, which means they understand this game.  They tend to congregate within a specific niche or content arena, which is the wheelhouse of your strategic commenting opportunity.

The right audience is there, in the right place, waiting.  It’s up to you to carry the right tune once you step on stage.

Because not everyone is there to propagate a self-serving agenda.  Many read blogs with a genuine interest and desire to learn.  Which is why the nature of your comments have inherent and significant potential.

If you sound like someone who has something to offer, and if you come off as humble and pleasant and sincere, chances are the earnest blog reader – which is precisely the person you want to attract to your site – will click through to you.

And even with the best of results, you’ll only snag a few.  It’s a long term strategy, one littered with the remains of tortoise-like commenters who yielded to impatience.

If you comment, and comment well, they will come.  From that point on your blog needs to deliver on that promise.  Which makes the comment itself an extension of your blog, and one with important strategic consequences.

Photo credit: David Boyle

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3 Tips for Bonding with Blogging Influencers



Forget traditional influencer marketing. We want to go deeper.

Bloggers teach influencer marketing from a less genuine space sometimes. Imagine learning how to try to get someone to do something for you. Manipulation marketing. Fear-based marketing. Problems arise; spam folders become your landing spot. I observe a decent percentage of influencer marketing emails in my spam folder because fear-pitches get labeled as spam and become spam, 100% of the time.

What is the solution? Learn how to bond with blogging influencers.

I remember people who befriend me. I admire people who endorse me or promote me. I appreciate people who buy my course or eBooks. I love people who generously help me for months. Guess what? Bonding with established bloggers influences the influencers. I do stuff for dear blogging friends I do not do for anybody else. If a friend sends me a guest post and their writing is tight, I place it. Even if said post spans 1000 words or more – my minimum count is 600 – I place it without hesitating. Friends found my heart. Friends influenced me through kindness and generosity. I am largely putty in their blogging hands.

Instead of trying to manipulate a successful stranger, bond with a friend. Change your approach to influencer marketing. Make friends. Help without asking. In time, blogging bonds form organically. If you practice writing, the world becomes your oyster because influencers take you to new levels of success, without you even asking.

Follow these tips to bond with influencers.

1: Buy a Resource

The best way to bond with an influencer is to get inside their heads.

Influential bloggers had to influence influential bloggers on the way up to become influential. Invest in a resource like my influential blogger eBook to learn how influencers do it. Speak their language. Connect. Take their viewpoint. Learn how to be influential yourself.

When you discover how to be influential through my resource you in essence, learn how to influence, influencers, by bonding with these pros.

2: Spend a Few Months Giving Not Asking

Bloggers I remember, then befriend, spend at least a few months giving and not asking. Someone buys my course, publishes 10 comments on my blog, and retweets my posts 10 or 20 times during a 3 month period. These people pop up on my radar screen because they gave and asked for nothing. Bonds form. Friendships develop.

Retweet fellow bloggers. Help them. Feature fellow bloggers. Open your blog to guest posting. Guest post on other blogs. Comment genuinely on blogs. Buy products.

Ask for nothing, for at least 3-4 months. Allow friendships to form organically. Blogging friends help each other because blogging friends trust each other. Influential bloggers fall into this helping lot too, as you generously serve them, ask for nothing and polish your writing skills. I gained more endorsements from pros by being generous than through any other method. Help influential bloggers. Ask for nothing. Influential bloggers help you without you asking for a darn thing.

3: Never Rush the Process

Some blogger friend requested me on Facebook a few moments ago. I scanned my messages to see his business pitch in the “other” folder. He simply rushed the process of pitching an established blogger. I appreciate the friend request but pitching your business before generously helping me ensures I ignore all future messages. He rushed the process so I let him go.

Perhaps he smartens up and begins helping me generously without asking for anything. After a few months of helping me and asking for nothing, we bond. We become friends. From there, the opportunities are limitless. Even if I do not use his service, if he has skills and a reputable business model I can share his services with my readers.

Good things take some time. Never rush the bonding process.

Allow bonds to form organically to do influencer marketing right.

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How Do Blogging and Fitness Relate?



I spend 3 hours daily honing my mental and physical fitness.

In truth, you can and will succeed online following simple fundamentals from a generous, detached energy. No need to be fit to go full time blogging. But if you feel bad because your body feels bad and your mind fears losing it all, have you succeeded? I do not believe so.

I wrote an eBook sharing my daily regimen to explain what many of you readers want to know: how do I do it all? I am no blogging god. I am just human. But I write and connect quite a bit. People wish to know how I wrote 100 plus eBooks in addition to all the other stuff I do while circling the globe. Well, blogging and fitness are 2 peas in a pod for me. Both play a big role if you desiring leveling up and feeling good predominantly as you enjoy the ride.

Blogging and Fitness

Let’s say you wake up on a Monday morning as a full time employee who blogs part time. Feeling terrible and dreading work, why write and publish a post? Too busy. Do it later. Put off the post until tonight. But you feel too tired that night. Repeat this cycle for 3 months. 90 days passed. Still no blog post. Why? You filled your mind with fear and pain. Manifesting as blogging loss, backburnering the post for 3 months indicates fear in mind. Why fear? 100% of the time, fear dominates minds of people who spend zero time on mental fitness, never meditating or doing deep yin yoga or observing their thoughts and feelings. Most of the time, these same folks dominated by their own fears never commit seriously to being physically fit through exercising.

Feel good by caring for your mind and body. Vibe higher than fears crippling most bloggers. Imagine the above scenario with one difference: you devote 1-2 hours daily exercising and raising your energy via mindset training. Devote 30 minutes to power walking and 30 minutes to deep yin yoga. On waking that Monday morning, either a blog post idea finds you and you write the post, or after a few uncomfortable moments and feelings, the idea flows to you and you write the post.

I cannot explain this process logically because it flows 100% emotionally, feelings-wise. Visualize yourself in moments you feel really good. All seems possible. Ideas flow to you. Opportunities flow to you. Why? Feeling good magnetizes you to freeing, success-promoting ideas. Being fit mentally and physically is the easiest way to feel good most of the time. Plus in those moments you feel bad mentally and physically, you face, feel and release the bad feelings, quickly, because you feel mentally and physically fit, predominantly.


Being fit naturally alerts you to the success-promoting idea of gratitude. Gratitude builds blogging success because seeing every penny of income, every blog comment and all interest in your blogging courses feels awesome to you. Feeling awesome inspires you to blog for years generously. Blogging generously for years makes you successful.

Corey at the Good Oil Marketing retweeted my blogging course recently. I feel grateful he spread the word for me considering he is a successful, high level marketer. I feel these feelings and build on my success because I feel grateful. I feel grateful because I trained my mind and body to feel good, through being fit daily, in order to tune into appreciation easily.

Get fit.

Don’t quit.

Be a successful blogger by being mentally and physically fit.

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Why Doing this Works Better than Asking for Business Referrals



After I released my flagship eBook – How to Retire to a Life of Island Hopping through Smart Blogging – I noticed something neat. My sales increased 12 fold the day I published a guest post for a highly successful blogger.

Seeing this spike clued me in to the quickest, easiest way to increase business: help people for free. Being generous improves skills, increases exposure and expands your business. Greater traffic and profits follow generous bloggers because helping people for free helps you be skilled and see, two qualities in every prospering blogger who reaps sweet blogging profits.

A large set of bloggers goes in another direction. Some ask for business referrals from trusted blogging buddies to drum up business. Feel free to take this route but know referral fishing is an ineffective way to drive profits because of two clear reasons:

  • referral-seeking seems to be time-wasting
  • referral-seeking rarely inspires trusted bloggers to take clear, business-building action, for you

I know 20 plus web developers. A few trusted blogging web developer buddies have reached out to me, seeking referrals. Two issues arise:

  • the referral seeker has no idea if I know bloggers needing web development; non-targeted campaign
  • I already know 20 plus developers, trusted buddies all, so I could never choose one to refer to someone if 20 seem qualified

Top Bloggers Become Ruthlessly Effective with their Time

Versus seeking referral business by asking blogging buddies if they know someone requiring your service, spend 20 minutes to write and publish a quality guest post for a blogger in your business niche. Instead of pitching 1 human, show off your web development skills for free, via a guest post, for 1,000 people. Do you see what I mean? Leverage. Do not ask for business. Serve for business. Although time needs pass and generosity needs inclusion in blogging business-building, helping for free is the quickest, simplest way to increase blogging business because you reach large, targeted audiences of clients with your attention and energy versus asking 1 person for business in non-targeted, ineffective fashion.

12 Times Daily Sales

I recall the day vividly, 5 years ago. I created and launched Blogging From Paradise. Before writing 100 plus eBooks, I wrote one. I did drive some sales through my blog but guest posting woke me up; why not leverage my presence and grow business by helping people for free, via different platforms? Eye-opener for me. Instead of asking, I gave. How easy? Giving freely is the easiest way to get freely. I observed a 12 times daily sales eBook increase for good reason that day: helping people generously through sites other than your blog is a simple way to grow your blogging business.

The simplest, direct, effective way to grow your business is to help people for free. Asking for referrals leads to a client or customer here and there, but full time bloggers are not in the “here and there” business as far as growing your venture. Pro bloggers drive steady profits through their blog by being generous on their blog and on other platforms.

Be helpful for free. Publish posts. Submit guest posts. Run a podcast. Broadcast live on Facebook. Help people for free to help people for pay. Versus untargeted referral-seeking, this is the effective way to grow your blogging business from a generous, genuine energy.

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